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Dating: Locating Mr./Ms. Right? (Part 4)

A large part of the answer you seek in gaining the attention of, and ultimately of finding the right man, lies in Father bringing the right man your way. There is also the component of you being open to the man He escorts into your life.

The hard part is waiting and trusting Him, giving Him the freedom to bring the right fellow your way—or not, should He have a better plan—and of you not rushing or forcing the issue with an inappropriate use of your physical resources.

In the meantime, there are clear things for you to do that are part of God’s will for you: Take good care of yourself. Work out diligently. Achieve and maintain your best body weight. Use the counsel available to you to dress attractively. Determine and then discover how to make appropriate statements about the inward qualities. This should be accentuated by what you wear and how you carry yourself.

Make certain you update your hair style, and spend an extra dollar or two to get a stylist who can give you clear and professional counsel about what styles and colors will look best for your face shape and skin color. God gave people special abilities to select makeup, lip colors, and to solve complexion challenges. Use their expertise. While humbling, find a shopping buddy whose wardrobe and style you admire, and that might be just a bit out of your comfort zone, and seek her counsel.

Don’t ever lose sight of the fact that you are deeply loved by your Heavenly Father and should, therefore, carry yourself with the grace and confidence of a woman who knows she is loved regardless of her physical appearance.

Understand this: Without fail, every time you look into the mirror, Satan will seize the opportunity to address you with either—or both—of two accusations. First, he will accuse, "If only…" Fill in the blank: hair, breast size, weight, hips, teeth, nose, etc., etc. Second, he will accuse using a comparison: "I’m glad I have (or don’t have)…" and fill in the blank using the list above.

Adopting either of these accusations demeans you as a person and discounts the ultimate perspective on your value, validity, and worth as a person which are all determined by your Heavenly Father. Satan’s accusations against you are fundamentally attacks against the opinion and credibility of God’s perspective in your life. The choice before you is simply this: Will you determine your worth based upon the temporal or the eternal?

One final thought: Keep in mind that there are many Christian men outside of your current circle of friends and social structures. You might consider looking other places. There are lots of Christian men learning to dance, write, mountain bike, paint, etc., etc.

There is also a book we sell through the office by Rob Eager that you might be interested in reading. You can contact us at www.lifetime.org or toll free at 888-395-LIFE (5433) to order, "Power of Passion."

Preston Gillham

About the Author

As a co-founder, Preston Gillham led Lifetime for 30 years. Preston is a writer, speaker, and leadership guide. He has authored numerous articles and several books including No Mercy and Battle for the Round Tower. He blogs on “Life and Leadership”. More about Preston, his writings, speaking, and his consulting practice can be located at PrestonGillham.com.