Jesus Christ is the same
yesterday and today,
yes and forever.
Hebrews 13:8 (NAS)
I am going through the most difficult experience in my life. My private little space has been shaken, violated, turned upside down. The fragile peace that the world offers because "everything is going great!" has disappeared. Have you been there? Are you there right now? No one really knows what you're going through. You don't want to talk about it. Well, we are together. You are with me and I am with you.
So a friend says to me, "I know you gain strength by spending time in His Word." Someone else, "I know your prayer life has grown exponentially through all this trauma." Someone else: "I know you are feeling His presence enfolding you every moment."
No. Not really. I find it difficult to sit down and read my Bible. It seems being busy doing something'anything'is more helpful for me. And praying? I'm not imploring or begging God to do anything. I'm not knocking louder and louder as though He has difficulty hearing. And there are times when I am not aware of His presence at all. (Does that mean He isn't there? Hardly.)
You may think I'm in denial or too tired to face reality. But I find no fault with my circumstances. God did not promise that we would never hurt or suffer or be emotionally distraught. He promised to be with us in all of our pain and suffering.[1] I believe that and hold tenaciously to that promise, refusing any thoughts to the contrary. He is with me from the moment I wake up until I fall exhausted into my bed. He never leaves and He understands.
Today was a really tough one but He was with me today just as He has been with me every day of my life as His beloved child. Why would He not be with me especially when I'm so needy? To ask Him to be with me would be doubting the promise He has given to me. Amazing isn't it? I do not know what tomorrow will bring, but I know without a shadow of a doubt'unequivocally'that He is with me and that He is watching over me. He said He would do that:
Consider what He has done'before the foundation of the world
He chose us to become, in Christ, His holy and blameless children
living within His constant care Ephesians 1:4 (JBP).
Cling to those words. Say them over and over again. "I am living within His constant care." His life-plan for me has not changed. Every single day of my life was written down before there was a single day in my life![2] He is acutely aware of me and every incident no matter how small or how foreboding. I do not blame Him for what is happening. We live in an alien world where we are surrounded by cruel, malicious enemy troops and we are not exempt from their evil. In the world, Anabel, you have trials and tribulation, distress and frustration'that, too, is a promise.[3]
No, I simply trust. I rest in this world that is spinning out of my control, knowing that He is the same today as He was yesterday and will be tomorrow'forever! Oh, I know Him. I know Him from so many yesterdays! I am engulfed by His love'secure in His love'constantly. His love will never leave me and not only is His presence surrounding me, His presence is inside of me.[4]
I know that this experience will bring me ever closer to Him because He is so tenderly walking with me'but then, He has been tender through all of the other hurts, hasn't He?
