Home Menu

Sometimes I Wonder, Do You?

When I awake in heaven, I will be fully satisfied, for I will see You face-to-face.
Psalm 17:15 (TLB)

Andrew Murray:

“Oh, the thought to have God all alone to myself, and to know that God has me all alone to Himself.”

Seeing You “face-to-face.”

I will, no doubt, be beside myself. My heart will be racing and I’ll be nervous and awfully excited'”all a-flutter.”

I’ve read books about the early pioneer days and how ordering a bride by mail was a common practice. I can imagine how “all a-flutter” a woman would be as she was on the last leg of her journey, riding the stage into the town where her new husband would step up and claim her as his bride. Oh, they would have been corresponding and would know a lot about each other, but seeing him face-to-face would be nothing short of emotional basket-weaving’in and out and up and down and around and over the top and through the bottom and in and out. . . .

Lord, I don’t want You to misunderstand me. I’m anticipating that time when I’ll see You face-to-face, and I know within my heart that it will be more wonderful than I can possibly imagine.

But sometimes I wonder. . . .

You are so precious to me today. The way we walk and talk together. And I don’t have to share You with anyone else. You are constantly with me’as close as my every breath. When I can’t go to sleep, I talk to You. You’re there. When I’m all alone and singing love songs to You, You’re listening. (You are so polite.) You’ve kept every tear I cried in a bottle. These things bring me so close to You.

Will our relationship be as sweet in Heaven?

I won’t need You then as I need You now.

I won’t rush to You for comfort and understanding.

I won’t need to talk to You about my problems.

There’ll be huge crowds vying for Your attention . . . and You know how I am about crowds’I just won’t go rather than get in a shoving match with a bunch of people.

Will You still hold my hand?

Can I still snuggle down in Your lap when things go wrong? (But things won’t be “going wrong” in Heaven, so I won’t need to sit on Your lap, will I?)

I like to close my eyes and climb the mountain with You when You isolate Yourself for prayer. And we won’t be doing that anymore.

I like the story about your walking with the men on the road to Emmaus’just strolling and talking.

Well, those are my thoughts; and as You can see, there’s a lot of insecurity there for me, Lord. You’re my best Friend. You are my Confidant, my Protector, my Knight in shining armor. You know, I’ve got a good thing going here, and I don’t want to lose it.

Maybe I should look at this dilemma and answer myself the way I used to answer the boys when they would ask, with teary eyes, if our latest beloved dog that had come to an untimely end would be in Heaven.

I’d say, “You are going to be so happy in Heaven’and if having Esther (or Dutch, or Grundoon, or Gretchen, or Zeke, or Zoro) with you will make you happier, then God will see to it that you have Esther.”

I guess what I had better do is make the most of the time I have with You now, believing that I’ll have everything I need to be “so happy” when I finally see You face-to-face.

About the Author

Anabel spent decades teaching in many contexts through Lifetime Guarantee Ministries. She has taught countless others how to have a genuine intimate faith and a sound marriage. She shared from her heart about living from the heart. Lifetime’s beloved founder and mentor passed away November 7, 2010. Her legacy and influence are timeless and priceless.